What Is Good
by V. Sourweather
Summary: James and Lily argue on what they're truly fighting for. [Written for Yazzy]


_Summary:__ James and Lily argue on what they're truly fighting for._

_Rating:__ T_

_Warning:__ References to sexual situations (not described)_

_Disclaimer:__ I don't own anything, because J.K. Rowling owns everything. I don't make any money out of this story._

_.:._

_Written for the __**Monthly One-Shot Exchange of June**__ on HPFC, for Yazzy (__FountainOfStars__). I chose the prompts:_

_(pairing) JamesLily_

_(genre) angst_

_(genre) romance/fluff_

_(word) lost_

_(song) _Flares_ by The Script_

_(quote) "There is some good in this world and it's worth fighting for." — _The Two Towers

_I hope you like what I've done with those!_

_To be clearer with the genres: most of the fic is complete angst, and then it's complete fluff, so I guess it belongs to both genres!_

_Word count (without the A/N): 2,321 words_

* * *

_**What Is Good:**_** James Potter and Lily Evans**

Lily felt like this was the end of the world—no, of _her_ world—and it only made it worse that she felt like it was her fault.

She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. Gazing at the ceiling of her childhood bedroom usually worked, and she usually felt better looking at the fluorescent stars above her. But the truth was… Right now, she felt so lost that she paid little attention to anything other than her anger and her sadness.

James wanted her to believe that it was her fault only because he was angry and in pain, and so he'd shouted at her to go away from him and she _had_. How could she be so _stupid_?

She sat up and turned on the light. She was almost blinded by it and she squinted.

Her eyes were red and irritated from crying, and for once, James wasn't there by her side to comfort her. She couldn't help but look up at the stars once again, and they weren't shining anymore. They were dull, just white plaster against her ceiling.

A painful smile pulled at her lips and she shook her head. Of course they weren't shining. Her world was now as dull as they looked.

She turned off the light once more and curled on her side, a lone tear falling down her cheek. Alone… She was all alone in the darkness, and no one would be running in to help her.

She wanted _him_—only him, always him—to be by her side again… but he wouldn't come back. Not this time. Not when they had both shouted all the truths they wanted to keep hidden at each other's faces.

* * *

"_You need to stop, James," Lily told him seriously, sitting cross-legged on the bed._

"_I'm not doing anything," her fiancé replied, not even looking at her._

_It hurt. More than she would have expected it to hurt. She couldn't believe that they were back to where it all started. And all that because they didn't agree on _why_ they fought._

"_That's the problem," she argued. "It looks as if you joined the Order just because I did, or even worse. Because you had something to prove. Just tell me if it's the case, because I—"_

"_You think that's why I did it, Lily?"_

"_I don't know, okay? And that's the problem with you! I can never know anything before you do it. I'm—I can't just stand there and watch you throw your life away stupidly!"_

"_Stupidly?" he repeated incredulously. "I'm not doing anything stupid!"_

"_You're rushing into every single one of the most dangerous missions Moody is giving us!" she pointed out, her voice rising until it almost broke on the last word._

"_Because you're not?"_

"_I'm not risking my life every time I step out that door, no! You're behaving stupidly and until you stop, I think—I just think it's better if we call off everything. Because I don't want to be married to a dead man, James."_

"_I'm fighting for you, Lily!" he retorted almost violently, his fists shaking at his sides. "I'm fighting for a better world for us to live in!"_

"_That's the problem! I don't want another world… I want _our_ world, the one we're living in now. I don't want it to change, because… There _is_ some good in this world and it's worth fighting for. Until you realize that…"_

_He stared at her and shook his head. He really couldn't, she realized. He wanted it all to change, and he didn't get that _they_ would change if everything else did. She didn't want to have to change…_

_So she stood up, took off the engagement ring from her finger and laid it gently on the bed._

"_I'm going back to my parents' house, James. If you want to talk about that again… well, you'll know where to find me."_

_And she left him, his eyes burning holes into her back as she walked away from him._

* * *

When Lily woke up the next morning, her eyes were still painful and she rubbed her palms against them. Her head… How it ached.

And then she remembered. And she whimpered.

"Oh no… What did I do?" she asked aloud, to no one but herself.

She certainly didn't expect her door to open and her mother to walk in, her green eyes studying her carefully. _I must look like a mess_, Lily thought, but she painted a smile across her face (she'd never been able to fool her mother, so she didn't know why she even bothered).

"Honey…" the older woman started. "Maybe now is the right time to talk about it."

"I don't know, Mum. I just—"

"You left James. You must've had a pretty good reason to do so, because… He's a good man."

"But he doesn't believe in the things _I_ believe in." Lily sighed. "That's what hurts the most. Because he should know that—"

The doorbell rang, cutting her off, and they both straightened up.

"I'll go and take it. You prepare yourself, honey," Lily's mother ordered.

Prepare herself for what? It certainly wasn't for her, so why should she even bother?

"Sweetheart, hurry!" her mother called from the other end of the house. "It's for you!"

Lily took in a deep breath and rolled in her bed again, refusing to move. Until she realized that maybe… just maybe… But no. It was a foolish hope, and she wasn't a fool.

So she stayed hidden beneath her blankets and her pillows and blocked out any voice that could have reached her ears. She fell into a light slumber and jumped awake when she heard someone knock gently on her door.

"Mum, I don't want to see anyone!" Lily shouted so that her mother could hear her from the other side of the door.

There was a silence, and then a timid voice rose. "It's not your mother, Lily."

She instantly sat up in her bed, her eyes widening and her breath quickening. This was… This was _James_! He'd come back for her! And here she was, wallowing in sorrow in her bed. She couldn't let him see her like this.

"Don't enter now, give me a few minutes," she cried out in panic.

She climbed out of bed, removed her pyjamas and searched in her bag for new clothes. She picked a simple white T-shirt and black trousers, and the next thing she knew, she was heading for her mirror and trying to brush her hair with her hands.

She still looked like a mess, but at least her hair was tamed now, and she was wearing proper clothes. She slowly walked towards the door and opened it, finding James awkwardly standing in her hallway.

"James," she said, cautious not to let the storm of her feelings show in her voice.

"Lily," he answered, a little smile on his lips.

Lily spared a glance up the corridor to check if her mother was there and finally nodded at him to follow her into her room. He did, and they both stood silently in the middle of the bedroom.

"I wanted you to know that I thought about what you said," he finally declared, breaking the heavy silence. "And I realized you were right. There _is_ some good in this world and it's worth fighting for. So here I am, because—"

"You're not saying this just because you want to get me back, are you, James?" she asked.

He stayed silent and lowered his head. As always, a strand of his jet black hair fell on his forehead, and she had to resist the temptation of pushing it away herself.

He sighed and answered, "I'm not asking you to forgive me, Lils. I just—I didn't want you to be alone. I know how much you hate being by yourself."

Her heart broke a little. He was so… different from the James of yesterday, and she was afraid he'd just… change back into the other him. She didn't want to be anywhere near him when it happened.

But right now, he stood in front of her, and he looked so tortured and remorseful that she smiled a little.

"I just couldn't stand it yesterday," he said slowly, as if he was considering telling her this. "The way… The way you left. You—You broke my heart, Lils."

"You think you didn't break mine?" she retorted immediately.

"I never said that. I just wanted you to know how I felt." He stayed silent, and then laughed humorlessly as he continued, "It always ends up in a fight between us these days, doesn't it?"

She laughed as well and twisted her wrists anxiously. He'd come here to apologize and here they were, bickering again like an old married couple. And that made her realize that maybe—

"Maybe it's the way it's supposed to be, right?" she asked hopefully.

He looked at her, his eyes shining behind his glasses. And then he stepped a little closer, and _she let him_. She couldn't stand the thought of being without him, and she wondered why she hadn't seen that before their incessant bickering in the past few weeks.

"Maybe it is," he replied, brushing his fingertips against her cheek. "Look, I'll let go of this for once, because I don't want us to fight again. But if we keep doing this…"

"I want you to stay with me, James. Please don't leave me alone ever again," she blurted out.

She hadn't meant to say the words, but now that they were out in the open, she couldn't take them back. She waited nervously for his answer, and when he opened his mouth again, she let go of the breath she didn't know she was holding.

"I won't," he promised. "You are not alone, Lily Evans. And you won't be ever again."

She grinned for the first time in what seemed like forever, and he smiled back at her and all seemed fine for the briefest of moments, before something he'd said the day before came back to her mind.

"Promise me you won't fight just for me anymore, but for everyone. For every good thing in this world. Promise me you won't try to change anything." She paused, and then she went on before he could stop her. "I know you don't want me to be alone anymore, but that doesn't mean I need you to take care of me. I can protect myself."

He didn't hesitate before he replied. "I won't fight just for you anymore. Someone very wise once told me that there is some good in this world and that it's worth fighting for. So I'll take you up on that one."

"Okay," she said, letting herself feel completely relieved for the first time since the day before.

"Okay," he repeated.

She smacked him on the arm and he laughed heartily. And just like that, they were those two innocent people again, the ones that fought for what was right, and Lily had never felt better.

"Can I confess something?" he asked suddenly.

She nodded, the smile never disappearing from her face, and she was surprised when his grin vanished like it had never been there in the first place.

"I was lost. I lost myself, and you brought me back on the right path. That's why I love you, Lily Evans. That's why I'll always love you, no matter what happens to us."

She stayed silent and decided that just maybe, the right way to answer him was not with words, but with her actions. So she stood on her tiptoes and placed a delicate hand on his neck, and even if she had promised herself that she wouldn't do this today, not after their fight, she kissed him all the same.

She was right to do so, because instantly, his hands fell on her hips and brought her impossibly closer to him as he kissed her back. And as always, they just _fit_ together.

When they finally pulled away from each other, she smiled a little.

"I missed that," she confessed, giggling a little.

"You had that yesterday morning, love."

"That's a long time ago," she countered, a smirk on her face. "And must I really remind you of everything we'd done before _that_ kiss?"

His eyebrows raised on his forehead and he smirked. "Your mother's there, so I think you'll have to—"

"Mum!" Lily called before he could finish. "I'm leaving!"

She didn't wait for her mother to answer before she Apparated with him to their house. And when he kissed her again, even more deeply this time, she smiled and walked backwards until she reached their bedroom door.

* * *

"Maybe we should fight more often," he told her, his fingers drawing patterns on her shoulder.

"James…" she started threateningly.

"I was just kidding, Lils. You know I don't like it when we fight." She nodded, but growled when he continued, "But if this is our way of making it up each time it happens… You have to admit, it's not that bad!"

"Oh really?" she taunted him. "And if we're not making it up like this?"

"Huh. Then it's not worth the fight."

"I thought so," she said, satisfied. "So you better stop talking and kiss me instead, because really… You talk far too much!"

He stayed silent for a few seconds before he kissed her shoulder, laughing a little against her skin. "You know, Lily Evans, you're a complicated woman. But I like complicated, so…"

She shook her head, turning towards him and noticing the mischievous glint in his eyes. And as always, she forgave him for what he had just said, because _how could she not?_

Maybe they were both right, and they were both meant to always keep fighting (whether that be each other or against Voldemort), but it was always supposed to be like this. They were just meant to be.

* * *

_I hope you liked this, Yazzy! :)_


End file.
